At Least, I Hope
by EyeofAmethyst07
Summary: "Azelf tried. She really did. But no matter how hard she strained, she couldn't remember anything. Somehow, she knew that telling the truth was going to hurt Uxie. But she couldn't lie to him. She'd forgotten how." Azelf struggles with amnesia as Uxie fights to help her piece together her past. AzelfxUxie, PLEASE REVIEW!


**A/N- Hello, world! EyeofAmethyst07 has returned with more story!**

 **If you're somebody who's read my other stories, you must be thinking;**

" **Why is he writing a fourth story when he hasn't updated his other three for so long? What's wrong with this joker? Doesn't he have planning skills?"**

 **Apparently, no. As to why I haven't updated, I have two unforgiving words to say:**

 **WRITER'S BLOCK**

 **It is slowly killing me from the inside out. I'm holding out, though. I've written before, and it's only a matter of time before I get a sudden, heroic flash of inspiration. I'm really writing this story as confirmation that, yes, I am still alive and well (as far as this site goes…)**

 **However, if you're new to EyeofAmethyst07, then I highly suggest you read my Bio. Might find something interesting in there!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon. I do own other things, however. Very nice things.**

 **Now, then. Shall we begin?**

At Least, I Hope

The little blue Pokémon glanced around the massive white room. At least, they'd _told_ her it was white. She still wasn't sure what 'white' meant.

"She must stay with you. I see no other reason or alternative."

That was the big white thing at the far end of the table. She _thought_ it was a table. She honestly wasn't sure anymore.

Then, a little grey thing that was floating next to her shook his big yellow head. At least, she _hoped_ it was yellow. It would be very bad if she was wrong. Maybe it was white.

"I did this to Azelf! I'm dangerous to her!"

 _Azelf?_ she thought. _Is that my name?_ She tried it out, savoring each syllable. "A-zelf" she said aloud. It stirred no memory from inside her. She clutched her sides and closed her eyes. _I still don't know,_ she thought. _Why does that hurt so much?_

Although saying her name hadn't stirred her memory, it apparently stirred the council of other big things. At least, she _thought_ it was called a council.

The yellow (?) headed thing whirled around to face her, and he grabbed her small paws in his own. "Yes," he said in a tone that sounded like desperation. "Your name is Azelf." _Azelf,_ she thought again. No memory was stirred, and her heart sank.

The yellow thing looked at her hopefully. "Please remember." he pleaded. "I'm Uxie."

 _Uxie._

That name sparked something. Azelf felt a small twitch of warmth go off inside her somewhere, as if her body remembered who Uxie was, but her head didn't. Still, a small, calming warmth manifested itself in Azelf's paws. _There's hope._

Azelf raised a small paw and touched the yellow creature in the head, right on the bright red gem that sat on his head. _Hopefully_ it was a gem. She thought it was.

"Uxie?" she whispered. Another small warmth started in her chest, and Uxie's eyes brightened with hope. "Yes." he said softly, yet firmly. "Do you remember me?"

Azelf tried. She really did. But no matter how hard she strained, she couldn't remember anything. Somehow, she knew that telling the truth was going to hurt Uxie. But she couldn't lie to him. She'd forgotten how.

So the small Being of Willpower simply shook her petite blue head, cowering backwards slightly. Uxie didn't appear angry or upset, though. He simply squeezed Azelf's paws. "You will. I promise."

A voice from far away shouted out. "It's hopeless, Uxie." All heads in the _hopefully_ white room turned to a pink-grey lizard/cat thing had his arms crossed over his armored chest, a scowl on his face. "She can never come back. You know it."

Uxie released Azelf's paws to face the lizard/cat, and Azelf suddenly felt colder now that the yellow head's reassuring touch was no longer gracing her. _Who am I?_ she thought.

"Shut it, Mewtwo!" yelled Uxie. "Just because _you_ gave up on Deoxys doesn't mean _I_ have to give up on Azelf!" These words seemed to make 'Mewtwo' angry, and he stood up, his tail flicking angrily behind him. Azelf _really_ hoped it was called a tail.

"She was too far gone to save, and you know that!" yelled Mewtwo angrily. "You think I don't regret what happened?"

"It sure as hell looks like you don't!" snapped Uxie. "She was _right there,_ and you still didn't do anything. I don't want that kind of thing on my conscience at night." Uxie turned to Arceus suddenly. "I'm taking her to Valor. Now, and alone. If I'm _ever_ going to bring her back, then-."

"That is unwise, Uxie." said Arceus. "And when you make an unwise decision, there are always disastrous consequences. The very thing you are trying to fix is proof of that." Uxie snarled, and for some reason, this terrified Azelf right to her core. Some memory hidden in the deepest recess of her subconscious told her that Uxie was supposed to be nervous, shy, and warm-hearted. Not… _angry._

Azelf had a feeling that _she_ was supposed to be the angry one.

"I wasn't asking, Arceus." growled Uxie. "I'm taking Azelf there _now._ " The big white thing, Arceus, rose from where it was sitting. "Do not defy me, Uxie." lowed Arceus. "I understand where you are coming from, but you cannot simply-."

"Do you really?" interrupted Uxie. "Do you really know what either of us are going through? Maybe I should look Giratina in the eye someday and watch _your_ reaction." Arceus' eyes let a sliver of fear slip through them. He looked like he really wanted to say something, but couldn't. Uxie nodded and turned to Azelf. His expression immediately softened, and he grabbed her around her waist, as if trying to support her.

"Come on." he said gently. "Let's get you home."

"Home?" she asked timidly.

Uxie nodded. "Yes. Home."

 _Home._ That word sounded odd to Azelf. She knew what it meant: a place where someone stayed every day, a place that brought good memories. But if Azelf had no memories, did she truly have a home? The Willpower Pokémon looked over at Uxie, who was pushing other creatures, some over four times his size, out of the way. _Uxie can help me remember,_ she thought hopefully. _He'll make sure that I find my home._

At least, she _hoped_ he could.

/-\\-/-\

"This is… home?"

Uxie glanced down at Azelf when she said that. Although they looked to be about the same height, Azelf was cowering at almost anything that moved, and sometimes at things that didn't move. She kept a firm grip on Uxie's short torso, trying to keep herself warm.

"Yes." he said. "This is your cave. You live here. In your home." Azelf looked around the room, and curiosity moved her away from Uxie's side. Something near the center of the room caught her red gaze, and she slowly hovered towards it. There appeared to be a pattern of flashy, blue stuff covering the center of the cave. She pointed a grey paw at it and looked at Uxie, who had followed her closely.

"What is… that?" she asked slowly. Uxie floated up from behind her and grabbed her paw gently, pushing it down until it skimmed the surface of the blue stuff. The stuff got her paw wet, and Azelf recoiled in fear, hiding behind Uxie's slim form. The Being of Knowledge laughed softly and turned around, grabbing Azelf's paws in his own. That warm feeling spread across her body again, and Azelf felt her lips twitch slightly.

"That's called _water._ " said Uxie lightly. "It's good for you. It doesn't hurt." The small legend floated over to the 'water' and thrust his paws in it. Little droplets splashed all over the place, and Uxie smiled over at Azelf. "See? Water is fun."

Azelf inched forward nervously. "Fun?" she whispered. _Why don't I know what that is?_

Uxie nodded, and he gestured for her to join him by the water. She slowly neared the water, still slightly afraid. She skimmed the water's surface again, but didn't recoil. The cool blue liquid felt relaxing as it flowed through her fingers, and Azelf felt her lips twitch upwards again. Then an idea entered her head.

Azelf glanced up at Uxie, who was looking at her with an odd expression she couldn't quite place. She tried to think of describing words, but her lack of memory rendered her story-telling skills useless. Going on the whim she'd had earlier, the blue amnesiac swiped her paw through the water quickly, splashing Uxie with the cool liquid. Taken by surprise, the yellow-head held his hand up in a petty defense.

Suddenly, Uxie used his tails to splash twin sprays of water at Azelf, who squeaked in surprise. As Uxie laughed, Azelf felt another bolt of warmth surge through her, this time much stronger. _This is what it means to be home,_ she thought. The two continued to playfully get each other wet, their 'fight' quickly escalating into a rampant game of chase around the cave. Just as Azelf turned around to see how close her pursuer was to her, Uxie grabbed her tails and pulled on them like rope, reeling her in.

Azelf felt her mouth corners twitch again, and she spun around and tackled Uxie to the ground. As Uxie fought to free himself, all the while laughing, Azelf noticed something odd. She let go with one of her paws and poked Uxie's yellow eyelids, which were practically sealed shut.

"Why don't you ever open your tails, Uxie?" she asked innocently. As soon as the words had left her mouth, Uxie violently pulled away from her. A look of pure terror was etched in his face, and he turned his head away from her, like he was ashamed. "They're eyes, Azelf." he said shakily. "I never open my eyes."

The warmth Azelf had been feeling disappeared as soon as Uxie's playful attitude did. Cold enveloped the Willpower pixie, and Azelf cowered slightly. _Why can't I remember anything? I'm hurting Uxie as much as I'm hurting myself._ Azelf reached out to Uxie, desperate to feel the odd surge of warmth that seemed to radiate from him. However, the yellow-head simply flinched away, as if he were afraid of anymore contact.

"Don't, Azelf." he said shakily. "I don't want to hurt you." Azelf tilted her head at his odd words. If she had to put a guess on which creature would hurt her, it would have been Mewtwo or Arceus, not Uxie.

"How can you hurt me?" she asked. "Fun doesn't hurt, right?" Uxie laughed hoarsely, before his look of fear returned.

"I've already hurt you, Azelf." he said. "I looked you in the eye."

Azelf tilted her head, confused. How could she be hurt by simply being looked at? "That's not bad." she said. "I like looking at you." Uxie flinched as if she'd slapped him in the face.

"When I look at someone, Azelf," began Uxie. "They lose all of their memories. Forever."

Azelf hovered slowly away from Uxie, now unsure if the creature in front of her was dangerous or not. _What? Is_ he _the reason I'm like this?_

"But how-?" Azelf started, unable to finish.

Uxie hung his head even lower in shame, if that was even possible. "I'm sorry, Azelf!" he said suddenly. "I never meant to do it, but you… you…" Uxie shut his mouth and turned away, not saying anything else.

"What is it?" Azelf snapped, feeling anger for the first time in… well, in as long as she could remember. She was fed up with not knowing. It tore her apart, stitched her back together, then ripped her in half again. She wanted a straight answer, and she figured Uxie was the most trustworthy of all the creatures she'd seen.

At least, she _hoped_ he was trustworthy.

"You hated me!" Uxie blurted out. "Every time I would come by, you would get angry and push me away. I only wanted…" Uxie trailed off again, somehow getting his head to hang even lower. Azelf lunged forward and roughly grabbed Uxie's shoulders. Unlike before, the yellow-head's touch didn't warm her. Now, it made her feel colder.

"What did you want?" she asked harshly, and Uxie flinched under her grasp. "Revenge? Is that what you wanted?"

"I WANTED YOU!"

Azelf let go of the twisted pixie that she held, backing away slowly. _Who would ever want me? What was I even like?_

"What?" she whispered.

Uxie turned towards her, his paws extended in a placating gesture. "I wanted you to love me, Azelf." he said. "Just as I've been doing for our entire lives." Azelf flinched away from him, now thoroughly terrified of the yellow-headed pixie.

Uxie tried reaching out again, but Azelf scurried to the far side of the cave, near the exit. This seemed to hurt Uxie even more, but at this point, she didn't care anymore. "Please, Azelf." pleaded Uxie. "I know you probably are confused and angry, but give me a chance. I've never had one with you before." Azelf shook her head, beyond terrified, and began floating towards the exit.

Uxie moved forward, paw extended. "Wait!" he cried. "Azelf, please. I love you."

The Being of Willpower turned around, and growled at the approaching legend. "Well I don't." she spat. With that, Azelf blasted through the mouth of her cave, flying to nobody-knows where, leaving Uxie in her cave, heart in hand, and conscience in shreds.

Azelf tried to concentrate on nothing more than putting as much distance between herself and the mind-erasing helmet-head that resided in her home.

 _Home._ Azelf knew she didn't have one. Home meant having someone who cared for you, and no one cared enough to look after her. _Uxie cares about you,_ said a traitorous voice in her head.

 _No, he cares about himself,_ Azelf thought angrily. _He wiped my memory, then pretended to care. He's a deceitful liar._

Despite her attempts to deny Uxie's care, the same traitorous voice from before came back. _You never gave him a chance before._

Azelf snarled to herself. _That wasn't me. I don't know anything about what happened before. The past is lost forever, and I can't let that govern my life now. The only thing that matters is that he did this to me, and I'll never forgive him._

The traitorous voice sighed in her head. _You have to forgive him. It's the only way you'll ever find your home._

 _Home? With him? I will never have a home with him._

Azelf shut out the pain, confusion, and voices in her head, leaving emptiness behind. Flying like a bullet to nowhere, the legend of Will shot into the clouds. The small droplets of liquid splattered against her, making her colder than ever, both inside and out.

 _Water is fun,_ Uxie had said. Azelf growled and flew faster. She knew that she would never, _ever_ care about someone who had practically taken her life. It went against all morals, all rationality, and all of her new-founded hatred for Uxie. And everyone knew it was impossible to love someone who you hate.

At least, she _hoped_ so.

/-\\-/-\

 **E/N- Whoo! That's the angiest fic I've ever tried to write. It won't be as long as my other ones, though…**

 **Leave a review! Please! I want to know if this was even a good idea in the first place.**

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 **EyeofAmethyst07**


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